Yankees Suck postsFriday July 26, 2013
The Worst Tweet Ever, or Sympathy for C.C. Sabathia
Tonight I noticed the Tampa Bay Rays scored six runs off in the top of the second off C.C. Sabathia, who, until recently, was the Yankees was most dominant pitcher, and a good part of the reason they won their 27th championship in 2009. So I had a little fun. I tweeted the following:
C.C. see ya, goodbye
C.C. see ya, don't cry
The ringing doubles that take you
Away from us no words can tell how glad it makes us
I thought I was kind of clever. (Well, lame third and fourth lines, but I have a day job.) I thought I really stuck it to the guy. But I'm a piker compared to some Yankees fans.
On Twitter, that selfsame Twitter, I noticed C.C. was trending and checked out what people were saying. Here's what one Yankees fan was saying:
Notice that he's sending that not only to C.C. but to C.C.'s wife, too. If you dig deeper you'll find out he's tweeted 500+ times and has eight followers.
Stay classy, Bronx.
New York Yankees' Beat Writer Envies Free-Spending Ways of Boston Red Sox
My father alerted me to these lines from Tyler Kepner that appeared in an article in today's New York Times entitled “Red Sox Are a Monster Again”:
With a chance to reset, the Red Sox invested $100 million in seven free agents without guaranteeing $40 million to any of them. Teams like the Padres can only dream of such spending, but big-market bullies like the Red Sox are rarely so disciplined.
Kepner normally covers the New York Yankees.
For the uninitiated, here's a New York Times graph of team spending from 2001 to 2011. The Red Sox, those undisciplined big-market bullies, were the second spendiest team during this period. But they weren't the spendiest. Not even close.
The Yankees Have a Negative Run Differential
This is the AL East standings after the New York Yankees lost to the Tampa Bay Rays 8-3 tonight:
Question: When was the last time the Yankees had a negative run differential this late in the season? I can't remember it.
As you can tell by the numbers, the team is actually lucky to be six games over .500. But over a long season, run differentials tend to play out correctly. Bad news for Yankee fans, good news for the rest of us.
No One Walks Off the Island
This was waiting for me, on a sad, rainy day in which death was in the air, when I got home. It's called “Hitting Forty” by Mark Ulriksen. Anyone who knows me knows it leaves nothing but joy in my heart. It made my day. Even with Ichiro in there. And Mo, I suppose. But Mo has his rings.
It helps that the Yanks, so named for a particular form of onanism (yank ye dildo -> yankee doodle -> yankee), have started the season 0-2.
Oh, and subscribe to the New Yorker already, people. Jesus.
So Let's Root, Root, Root for a Kind of Licensing Fee to Secure All the Rights to Market a Commercial Boon
Here are two paragraphs from David Waldstein's well-researched, front-page story, “Hitched to an Aging Star: The Anatomy of a Deal, and Doubts,” about how the 10-year deal between the Yankees and Alex Rodriguez was struck during the 2007 off-season:
Ultimately, the terms of the deal would include $265 million in guaranteed salary, a $10 million signing bonus and an additional $30 million in marketing bonuses tied to landmark home runs.
For each of the five milestones — tying Mays, Ruth, Aaron, Bonds and breaking the record — Rodriguez would receive $6 million. The Yankees looked at the bonuses as a kind of licensing fee they would pay to Rodriguez to secure all the rights to market the home run chase, which would presumably become a commercial boon.
Licensing fee ... to secure all the rights to market ... a commercial boon. That's business-speak for setting the all-time HR record. Makes you want to throw up. Makes you want to stop watching the national pastime altogether.
But for a Yankee hater like myself, there's great, great joy in the article. What's the greatest joy? This: The Yankees and their fans are saddled with their most-hated player, A-Rod, and his albatross of a contract, which still involves more than $100 million, because one of their most beloved players, Mariano Rivera, convinced A-Rod to stay. Ha! Talk about a cutter.
Meanwhile, many pundits, including Tyler Kepner in the Times' print edition, are predicting that the Yankees won't just finish out of the post-season; they'll finished last in the A.L. East.
I'll believe it when I see it but for now it's a possibility. Because it's the start of baseball season, when hope springs eternal. And when every fan of every baseball team thinks that this might be the year, this might finally be the year, when the New York Yankees eat the shit of the rest of the league.
Alex Rodriguez making the second-to-last out of the 2012 ALCS. It will be his last at-bat until at least July.
Twitter: @ErikLundegaardTweets by @ErikLundegaard