Yankees Suck postsSunday July 15, 2018
“I confess it: There is some resentment. But it never degenerates into emulousness or envy. No one elsewhere wants to root for a team like the Yankees. The notion is appalling. Could any franchise be more devoid of romance? What has it ever represented but the brute power of money? One can admire the St. Louis Cardinals' magnificent history, or cherish fond memories of the great Baltimore Orioles, Cincinnati Reds or Oakland A's teams of the past. But no morally sane soul could delight in that graceless enormity in the Bronx, or its supremacy over smaller markets. It is an intrinsically depraved pleasure, like a taste for bearbaiting. And certainly none of us wants to be anything like Yankees fans — especially after seeing them at close quarters. ...
”Not that the horror is easy to recall clearly. The trauma is too violent. Memory cringes, whines, tries to slink away. One recollects only a kaleidoscopic flux of gruesomely fragmentary impressions, too outlandish to be perfectly accurate, too vivid to be entirely false: nightmarish revenants from the dim haunts of the collective unconscious ... monstrous, abortive shapes emerging from the abysmal murk of evolutionary history ... things pre-hominid, even pre-mammalian ... forms never quite resolving into discrete organisms, spilling over and into one another, making it uncertain where one ends and another begins. ... It really is awful.“
David Bentley Hart, ”The New York Yankees Are a Moral Abomination," in The New York Times
Severino Chases Record*
This was a headline a few days ago on ESPN.com:
It took me a second to realize that Yankees pitcher Luis Severino wasn't chasing the single-season strikeout record (Nolan Ryan, 383, 1973), but the Yankees' single-season strikeout record (Ron Guidry, 248, 1978), which, in 1978, didn't even lead the Majors (J.R. Richard's 303), nor his league (Nolan Ryan's 260). In fact, the all-time Yankees mark simply tied 39-year-old Phil Niekro for third place that year. That's what's being trumpeted. That's the great glory Severino is pursuing.
This is a headline how? A player is on pace to break a mediocre team record. Baseball Reference lists Guidry's mark as the 186th most strikeouts a pitcher has had in a season. If you remove 19th-century records, as you should, it's still tied for 127th. That's it. That's the mark Severino might break.
Hell, this season, Severino is ninth in the Majors in strikeouts. Ninth.
Headlines like these are yet another reason people hate the Yankees. No other team gets this treatment.
Got this from an anonymous reader the other day:
i stg if you say anything about the yankees again i will hit you with the quadruple roundhouse spinning back fist to the femur, yankees are love, yankees are life. sir dont make me swing
Took me a moment to realize “stg” meant “swear to god.” Initially I thought he was just so filled with rage he couldn't type straight.
The Only Derek Jeter T-Shirt I'd Wear
Jordan Shusterman, a writer over at Cut4.com, has a piece from earlier this month called “Let's appreciate how long Ichiro has been playing professional baseball.” It's mostly timeline, and not bad, although my version would include different historic markers. But I particularly like this one: Shohei Otani was born two years after Ichiro began playing professional baseball with the Orix BlueWave. How about that?
Here's my favorite part, though. It's the historic marker for 2014.
It's the combo of words and images. Jeter seems to be celebrating with us that he's leaving.
In reality, Jeter was celebrating because his last at-bat at Yankee Stadium yielded a game-winning single. But it was a meaningless game—the Yanks missed the post-season by a big margin that year—so why such excitement? Because it helped secure his legacy and legend. It was another “Derek Jeter moment.” It was all about him.
But the above? Put it on a T-shirt and I'd wear it—the only Derek Jeter T-shirt I'd be caught dead in.
Cry Me a River
From David Schoenfield's ESPN article “The Evil Empire is Back! Why the Yankees being good is great for baseball”:
“The last three or four years had obviously been tough,” he said. “We made the playoffs a couple years ago and lost in the wild-card game to the Astros, but for the Yankees and our fans, it had been a disappointment, and nobody [was] more disappointed than the players inside this room.”
The he in the he said is Brett Gardner, who can drop and give me twenty. The above reads like a Wall Street exec saying the last few years have been rough because they‘ve only made 50 million instead of the 100 they were used to. Oh, and sorry, David, but can’t agree with your subhed. Suggested edit: “Why the Yankees being dangerous again is shitty for baseball.”