Shoutout to the headline writers at The Toronto Star. This is brilliant. Or at least a breath of fresh air.

Not a good day today. Or yesterday. Or the last five days. Or year. Or century, really.

Not sure when I began to panic with how Trump's tariffs were roiling the stock market. Might've been when the Dow plunged and he went, “Yeah, that's right, that's what I'm doing!” First term, it felt like he viewed Dow Jones like it was TV ratings or something, a reflection on him, and now not so much. Made me feel like the ant in the ant and grasshopper fable, except at the end, when the ant has spent his lifetime working to provide for the winter, a BIG FUCKING DOOFUS comes along and smooshes everything.